◄◊○◊►(v)øøLZ◄◊○◊►

2005-11-01T21:00:00.000+03:00

hala,
welllllll, nobody knows exactly when Eid is going to be down here in Abu-Dhabi. Its either tomorrow or after tomorrow, so nobody knows wheter to pray salaat at Eid tomorrow or after tomorrow and nobody knows when to stop fasting! Confusion CONFUSION!!!
Anyways, just incase Eid is tomorrow... EID MUBARAK Y'ALL!! Hope y'all been good this ramadan n'stuff...
Ramadan Kareem and Eid mubarak to the people who can be bothered to read my blog :D only to them...

2005-10-11T19:18:00.000+04:00

ramadan kareem every1 :D i hope y'all aint duckin' and dodgin' fasting, i kno some of u are, sneaky bastards...

2005-07-11T15:44:00.000+04:00

MamboZ pplz,
Sorry for the long pause in my posts. I was busy doing other more important things.

Right now i'ma chillin in Scotland for a week then bouncin back to AD. Not the most exciting summer in the world, just came to see the Wawie graduating.
Its been around 6 months since my last post, half a year, 24 weeks, around 180 days... dayyyyyyyyymmmmmmm........ feels good to be writing once again. but after soo long i got nuthin to say, how sad...
Nothing weird or exciting has happened to me lately. Just normal school, chillin out... doin the normal stuff an average boy of the age of 15 would do... nothig bad... really, nothing bad...

Peace out pplz...

2005-01-12T23:39:00.000+03:00

WELL EVERYBODY!!! Ma sista is bak from Military training, she arrived on the 12th of Jan, she came back sick from her roommate who was sick with a sickness, obviously.When i saw her at the place she was staying in, she came to me with a Military suit with camouflage n'shit. Now she can fix and load an M-16 which is given to her in 10 peices in under 20 seconds(cool hmmm.....?) She had her little hat and her boots, she looked like a little baby with army clothes...

2005-01-07T13:07:00.000+03:00

Did you know that most fast food restaurants were started by high school dropouts? Have any of guys seen the movie SuperSizeMe... about the guy who ate MacdonaldZ for breakfast lunch and dinner for 4o days? Dayymmm... how can we still eat that shit after watching that horrible account of a poor soul who stuffed himself with bergers? I aint goin near fast food AGAIN!!!

2004-11-29T19:48:00.000+03:00

Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.

2004-11-13T07:27:00.000+03:00

EID: Well people... IT'S FRIGGIN EID TODAY!!! WAAAAAA!!! NO MORE FASTING!!! As usual, on the 1st day of Eid nothing really happens... it's all about the 2nd and 3rd day where it get real real real serious. We are having a party tomorrow... so today, im decorating my room... hanging pictures up on the wall... and so on and so forth. Tomorrow we will receive, aquire, assume, collect, cop, inherit, obtain, redeem and take in possession of our moneY(Eidiyya)!!!!Man life is good... i wish all of you a happy Eid filled with money and umm...happiness i guess.
!!!EID MUBARAK FOOLS!!!

~Eid Mubarak~

2004-11-04T01:38:00.000+03:00

As you have all probably heard, The One And Only Sheikh Zayed Bin Sultan Al Nahyan has officially passed away(died). The whole country is currently grieving and crying... i was just about to cry but i didn't becuase, I AM A MAN! unlike my mom... We now have 8 days of mourning time(holiday). Every single friggin place has been closed off, so it aint really a holiday is it, i mean when u cant do anything. Don't get the wrong impression, i am NOT happy about his death. I wish he was still alive and this whole holiday never existed, i truly truly truly miss him. The man built this country from desert to paradise. From scratch. Now the man who made this country something, dies. Without him, we would still be living in tents... hunting for food, riding on friggin camels, and eating camel shit to survive. GOD BLESS SHEIKH ZAYED. Oh yeah by the way, all the tv stations have either been reading the quran or reporting on the election! hehe

2004-11-04T01:04:00.000+03:00

Allah Yar7amu

2004-10-22T22:28:00.000+04:00

Well, im now settling down at my new school. It's friggin tough. If you dont do your homework, you get suspended. I've gotten suspended 2wice in my first 2 weeks.
1st time: I "accidentally" kicked a ball over the fence onto oncoming traffic, which resulted in 11 deaths... but whos counting.
2ndtime: I kicked 3 peoples asses (between the ages of 4 and 7).
3rd time: I didn't do my homework.

Anyhoo, everyday our hall supervisor walks into our classroom and reads a sheet, the sheet says the following:
Aamer Bin-Dhaaer-Suspended. Reason: N/A
Ali Alawi-Suspended for 4 days. Reason: Failed an exam.
Khaleefa Zaabi-Expelled. Reason:Fell off his chair during a period.
Faisal Mazrooi-After school detention. Reason: No reason
Kareem Mohammed-Suspended. Reason: Talking in a free lesson.

^^^All that stuff is true^^^
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Appreciate what you have, well i dont... I always want more and more
One day . . . a wealthy family man took his son on a trip to the country, so he could have his son see how poor country people live.
They stayed one day and one night in the home of a kind farmer. At the end of the trip, and when they were back home, the father asked his son, "What did you think of the trip?"
The son replied, "Very nice dad."
Then the father asked his son, "Did you see how poor they were?"
The son replied, "Yes."
The father continued asking, "What did you learn?"
The son responded, "I learned that we have one dog in our house, and they have four.
Also, we have a fountain in our garden, but they have a stream that has no end.
And we have lamps in our garden . . . but they have stars!
And our garden goes to the edge of our property. But they have the entire horizon as their back yard!"
At the end of the son's reply the father was speechless.
His son then said, "Thank you dad for showing me how poor we really are."
One can ask himself what would happen if we give thanks for what we have, instead of always asking for more.
Learn to appreciate what you have. Wealth is all in one's point of view.

2004-09-11T19:17:00.000+04:00

Ok, listen up pplZ... i am deeply sowwy for not posting shyte... i just moved from the crappy place i used to live, i now have a nice duplex house with lots of windows. My living room has one huuuuge ass glass wall facing the sea and when you're standing next to it u feel like throwing up... no shit man. no shit.

Anyway, WOOT!!!! hehe

To tell u the truth, i don't umm.... really... have anything to talk about :P lol, all i can say is

POWER TO DA PEOPLE!!!

2004-07-08T05:01:00.000+04:00

My weird dream:
I was walking in the jungle with some friends and saw this guy selling candy.
I asked him, "Dude, why are you selling candy in the middle of the jungle, there aren't any customers here?"
Suddenly he brandishes a gun and breaks the silence by saying, "If you don't buy candy from me, I'll have no choice but to kill you"
I pull out my wallet and take out a $10 bill, I purchase a bag of fuzzy wuzzy Cola and Lemon surprise.
"Here you go, just don't shoot...", I looked at him and placed the wallet back into the rear pocket of my pants.
"Hey, actually I think I'll take your wallet"
"NO, you bastard!" i replied. I did a flip kick and smacked the gun right out of his hand, i turned to him and said... "I think i'll take your candy... BITCH!"
Moments later i caught up with my friends and sang the jungle song, it goes like this:

I was walking down the jungle with my dick in my hands,

Yo mutha fucka i'm the king of the land,

I open the door, and what do i see?,

A hundred naked ladies, waiting for me,

I fucked 98, my balls got sore,

I drank some milk and fucked 2 more,

Lalalalala...lalala....nananana....
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2004-06-30T01:53:00.000+04:00

Ppl these dayz...
How old were you when you stopped playing with damn pokemon cards? Ye man like 4~`~`~

I was in Abu-Dhabi and i was shopping for some Cd's, this tall mwatin guy with a dishdasha comes up to me and says yakhi, taba tillab maayay bokemon?(with a strain on the B) i told him i didn't have any cards on me so i told him maybe some other time. So i go into the Cd shop laughing my ass off like a little demented fool. People were observing my strange behaviour and were laughing too, cuz i got a funny laugh man, eventually the whole friggin store was crackling up and laughing like demented fools too, i thought to myself... "Where don't i fit in?"

Bad newZ Y'ALL!!!
The hip-hop, beat droppin, lemon squeezin MooLZ has officially equipped his mouth with braces!!! (ceramic almost invisible brackets to be eggzact)
~This story is absolutely 0% fiction and has occured during MooLZ's lifetime~
Let me tell yo smelly asses all about it:
"Come on Habiby, the driver is waiting downstairs" says the mother.
"Where are we going this time oh dear mother? Is it your boring non air-conditioned friends house?"
"No, were going to the dentist to get you braces"
Sweet mother of kaka!!! i think to myself... We get out of the house and go down to the car, i sit there and wait. Tick, tock, tick ,tock... I await my doom. We got out of the car and walk into the dentist's *work shop* i sit there, my life flashing before my eyes, i think about my reputaion for being *the cool guy around here*, but then it will be *the cool guy around here... with braces* They inject about 6 injections into my mouth.
The feeling of my mouth intact with my body slowly withered away, till all i could feel was a big......nothing. I got really dizzy and almost passed out. The sound of my mom talking to the surgeon faded into the darkness, everything turned wavy and unfocused. I fell asleep... dreaming that i was in a world of teeth and ice-cream. I woke up and saw this guy staring down at my face and asking me if i was alright.
The surgeon wearing a hillbilly hat and a straw in his mouth comes to me with a pair of plyers and says, "You gowwwwn die bitch!"
Nah, he told me that all i would feel was pressure but minimal pain. He pulled out four teeth, and cut the muscle from under my toung(don't ask why). The orthodontist walks in and puts me to sleep... she forced me to drink this nasty ass poison, i thought she was trying to kill me with some arsenic. Well i fell asleep, she put the braces on me and everything.
For around 8 days, I had trouble eating and adjusting with my new braces... to tell you the truth half the people in my class didn't notice till i told them i was wearing the damn thing.
For all the people who are gonna get braces... my words of advise, Don't worry about getting brackets, i thought by getting 'em... everyone would make fun of me and call me pottery man (cuz i got ceramic braces). But no one said shit, i was truly surprised, people don't give a rat's ass what you look like, they take in your heart not what you got in your mouth... i'm gettin all sentimental and shit so i'm gonna stop now before i start cracking myself up :D umm... ==Don't Drink and Drive==

~~~By the way my cat was sleeping on my lap all the way through writing this~~~
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2004-06-28T18:21:00.000+04:00

Money

MooLZ story:
When I was growing up, money wasn't especially tight, but my mom was a real penny pincher anyway. She would collect coins, and roll them so that she could deposit them in the bank. She was rolling a roll of dimes, and a roll of nickels, and I in my ever lasting wisdom at age 5, I decided they would make a tasty snack. I ate 2 nickels, and a dime.

It so happens that she had saved just enough to make the rolls, and when she was short, she asked me if I had taken them. I told her I had eaten them, and that I had put them in my mouth. She told me to let her know when I had to use the bathroom, and not to flush the toilet. After I took a shit, she went in after me, and with a spoon, sifted through my shit to find the missing coins...and she did find them. She washed them off, put them in the rolls, and deposited them in the bank.

Moral of the story: Don't ever put a nickel or a dime in your mouth, because it may have been in my ass...
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2004-04-15T22:22:00.000+04:00

Sorry i haven't been writing any posts lately, i've been to0 damn bizzy eating chocolate...
-KeeP in tune thOuGH-

2004-04-07T04:31:00.000+04:00

The shawarma thief...

Introduction: The shawarma thief brings terror to all the hearts of Jacksonville city. He is the most professional kleptomaniac in all the land, no one knows his real identity except one man... and that man is a spy who works for the SDB (Shawarma Desecration Business), he is disguised as an FBI agent.

I used to own a shawarma stand in the ghetto, but not anymore... One day, he came... I had no idea he was a crook, he looked like an ordinary man but carried his trusty empty "Evil plastic bag." I nicely asked him, "Heyy wussup! WHyZ you be carrying'ing an emptY plastic bag........yo?"
"Its my good luck...ummm...plastic bag," he replied.
In my head i was asking myself, what kind of fucked up person carries a good luck plastic bag around?
"Can i have 2 chicken shawarmas and hold the chilli"
"Aiight homey, gimme a minute"
I turn my head away from my consumer for 3 seconds and find all my meat had absolutely abolished from sight! I see my customer running away with his lucky plastic bag and all my meat inside it...
"YOU SON OF A BITCH! YOU STOLE MY MEAT! IM GONNA EAT YO CHILDREN!"
Thats my story on how that bastard ruined my life...
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Another dramatic incident...
"I, the proud owner of a fancy restaurant in Toronto, Canada was robbed by... im too scared to mention his name in public..."
I was closing down my restaurant for the night and a customer walked into the crystal clear glass door and severly "injured himself". I asked him, "Sir are you ok?!"
"You know what would make me feel better?" He asked me.
"What?" I questioned him.
"A chicken shawarma, but hold the chilli please"
I make it for the bread and 2 seconds later i see him running away with a fairly large bag with all my meat stuffed inside it.
"COME BACK HERE FOOL! IF I FIND OUT WHO YOU ARE, ILL RING YOUR NECK!
After that day i shut down my fancy diner which resulted in a whole bunch of people losing their jobs...
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2004-04-06T02:34:00.000+04:00

RuSSkiiZ---By the Way im in Moscow, Russia... don't ask how i ended up in this ...LOVELY/...CLEAN/...Friendly.. city

What buggs, annoys, agitates, pisses me about russians is everytime im out chillin wiff ma homieZ (some are black) they stare and STARE, sometimes i think they have staring problems... I mean, how would you like it if you were walking anywhere or especially in a foreign environment and u always feel like someone is loooooking at you or that feeling when u know someone is watching you... yes yes i know, i know... its *******(fucking) annoying!!!

Once i was casually walking down the road to get some Mc. Donalds for lunch wit one of ma friends cuz i was chillin with him... and this MOB of skinheads{click here for definition} were literally pointing at us (Ugh! How rude is that YO! heheee) and trying their best to swear in english... frankly i think it was quite funny and scary cuz i mean they are... skinheads(^click on the link above^) and they can...kill you.
Sooo i keep walking with my best act to ignore them but i seriously got kinda freaked out, and from the corner of my eye i noticed them power-walking towards me. My bud and I realised that they were coming
for us... so i was like "Dude, on the count of 3 we run alright? 1----------2----------3" so we ran and ran all the way to Mc. DonaldZ and survived once more from the horrible fright of knowing if you don't run... YOU' GONNA DIE BITCH!

Another incident occured in those enclosed and... whats that nice word... forsaken markets in Moscow, the city i've been talking about^^^---but remember this happened only months after my disembarkation in Moscow... enjoy this true story :)

Well... i was shopping for some cheap shit at the cheap-ass markets in this cheap-ass city known worldwide as MOSCOW *shiver shiver*
Ma homie and I were looking for some B-B guns(or airsoft guns) and we stumbled across another angry MOB, hehe ANGRY...MOB! GET IT ANGRY MOB! no, i don't get it either, im really tired... anyways we were just about to enter the shop when I noticed 6 guys following us, I wasn't sure if they were following us but who wouldn't get the impression.... Persuing my instincts I(the wise one) tell ma oh so dear clueless homey to get the ****(fuck) out of here and go somewhere else. Whilst departing from the shop, one of the half-man half-boy skinheads confronts me with an angry look and a really bad haircut, "Dai mne Diengi," he says as if im supposed to know what the hell dai mne diengi means... (Since ive lived here for 2 and a half years now i found out it means... Give Me Money) "I don't speak russian," i said countering him, and the bastard(sorry for the language but i really hate that guy...) laughs at me as if i cracked a hilarious joke. By this time, my buD was waiting for me outside cracking his ass off and telling me to ignore the hillbilly... he seriously looked like one. I managed to step out of the store, the hillbilly guy followed us for a few meters untill his angry mob catches up, we start running and make a right turn onto a road that i forgot was there... as soon as i turned i executed a matrix bullet-time dodge(well... it was more like a step backward) and escaped being run over by a speeding motorist. Thats how my beautiful day ended.
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2004-04-03T03:32:00.000+04:00

Well today has been a shitload of shit...

----First I wake up all confused to look at the time and I see it is only 7:30 a.m Then I fall asleep again

then I wake up confused again and I look at the time and its 9:00 a.m Then I fall asleep again then I wake

up again to see its 2:00 p.m Ohh shit im late... i had to meet someone at 2 but i overslept. Then to add

to this disastrous situation i find that my wallet is missing which increases to the stress that is building up

every second in my large... buff... muscular... handsome body.(Yes i did brush my teeth)(Yes i did have a

shower)(Yes i can chew-gum and think at the same time) but i wont get into details...

I then find it somewhere *can't remember* and then i go for my mobile phone which is almost dead on
low battery.

I run downstairs and the guard who thinks i speak German harasses me and tells me his life story, i

thought by now he would have realised than i really dont speak German...

I run to the gate and call my friend to ask her where she is and he says, "Ohh yeah sorry man... i forgot all

about you..." but to my surprise she was right behind me but i didnt see her. We then take a cab to her

house and relax, listen to music... you know the usual *chilling* technique.

I thought it would be just us 3 but then we hear the door-bell ring and its her grandparents who

come to spend the day... i think to myself " Now she's done it! All that time of getting ready and being

harrased by a Nazi security guard finally payed off! *being sarcastic*"

Then it comes to my attention that its almost 8:00 p.m and i better get the **** out of here before the
real parents arrive... they didn't know i was there...

I leave the place, catch a cab back to my pad and finish the lovely day off by having a nice cold meal of the

usual and oh so popular 'rice and chicken'.

(this story is non-fictional and nothing but the truth)
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